Gratitude and a spiritual experience

So there I was driving back to Houston, again. Its six a.m. and I get a craving for a breakfast sandwich. I stop in at a gas station pick up a sandwich and am on my way. Fifty miles down the road the rumbling in my tummy begins. Fifty more miles and it happens, up comes the sandwich and that’s when I realize something may be wrong. Instead of turning around I decide to drive faster. I puke every half hour until I arrive in Houston around one. I get to my dad’s and lie down, assuming it will go away if I sleep it off. I wake up a few hours later and am still worse off. At this point I become concerned, I call around at get advice from a number of sources. I finally decide to head to the hospital assuming I will probably be laughed at for going to the hospital for a “tummy ache”. I have a hard time walking the 1000 feet from the parking lot to the ER and have to rest several times. When I arrive in the ER I am exhausted and throw up one more time. I am seen thirty minutes later and they take my vitals. BP 60/13 Pulse 168 Temp 100.3. The staff seems a bit worried and gets me back into a room. I explain that I must have eaten something bad and they agree. After a few hours they tell me I have food poisoning and a kidney infection and that I was pretty close to death when I came in. So I try not to freak out and wait for things to change. I have to explain to five different nurses that it is impossible to hit a vein in my right arm. They disagree but I prove them wrong and end up with bruises to show for it. My fever begins to climb and my blood pressure levels off at 80/30 so they decide to admit me. My fever peeks around 103.6 and I get loopy. At this point I go thru my phone and leave a number of people voicemails. I curse them for not answering their phone and I tell them that I admire them as people and love them and value our friendship. I begin to get worse and fade in and out of consciousness. When I am asleep I dream of an angelic scene with classical music and someone informing me that it isn’t my time. That I should stop wasting so much time and focus on the important things. I am filled with a sense of unique purpose although I am unclear what that purpose is. Resentments begin to seem nonsensical and I truly begin to feel the presence of my creator in that hospital room. After a night of this I wake in the morning and begin to come around. I am discharged by noon and make it to the gratitude lunch at Lambda. My dad and I both share about being grateful and I am truly moved. I spend more time with friends and catch up. I spend hours talking with some of my closest friends and have deep and meaningful conversations about chocolate and God and AA and Jesus. When I finally make it back to Lubbock I am a changed man. I hope it lasts but only time will tell. It was great seeing everyone this weekend and thank you all for your prayers.

Reed